Category Archives: Family

Family Restoration: 12 ways to Restore your Family

Posted by Nov 16, 2019 Holy Word, Family 6 Comments
Family Restoration: 12 ways to Restore your Family

Family restoration is the act of getting your spouse and children back to a satisfactory and joyful state at home.

The general divorce statistics in the United States shows that about 40 to 50 percent of marriages in the United States end in divorce. And The average length of time for first marriages ending in divorce is eight years. These statistics are worrisome and not acceptable for a healthy society.

If you are going through a challenging time in your family or you want to avoid family crash, then today’s message would be a great help for you.

12 Ways to Achieve Family Restoration

1. Seek Knowledge

Your home won’t perish if you read Bible passages that emphasize the significance of family. Read good books and articles on how to keep your home firm.

And your understanding will enhance your communication skill to your family during the restoration meeting.

Read passages such as: 1Corinthians chapter 7, Ephesians chapter 5, Malachi 2:16 and 1Peter chapter 3.

Jesus says: “But from the beginning of the creation, God ‘made them male and female.’ ‘For this reason, a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, ‘and the two shall become one flesh’; so, then they are no longer two, but one flesh. “Therefore, what God has joined together, let not man separate.” (Mark 10:6-9)

2. Remove the log of wood in your eyes

List all the complaints your spouse and children have against you. Arrange the source of conflict in categories. For Instance; financial, religious, philosophical differences and so on.

3. Make a long list

List all the complaints you have against your spouse and children. The purpose for the list is to achieve family restoration and not to cause more troubles.

4. Draw a comparison Table

Tabulate what you want from them and what they want from you on a single correspondence table. This will give you a clear picture of how to handle the conflict for a perfect family restoration.

5. Learn to overlook

No one can give you a perfect satisfaction in life, thus you have to learn how to overlook some issues.

6. Give room for second chance

Terrible issue such as cheat, abuse or stealing which cannot be overlooked should be resolved through forgiveness and giving the offender the opportunity to study the Bible for repentance.

7. Don’t play blame game

No one is a loser or winner during family restoration.

8. Fast and Pray

Fast and pray before calling the meeting for family restoration. Your family is best restored on spiritual foundation made by God.

9. Invite a man of God

If it is difficult to get the audience of your family members, then seek the help of a man of God to convene and coordinate the meeting. Such meeting is better done in the morning when everyone’s brain is calm.

10. Forgiveness is the Master Key

Ask for forgiveness during the reconciliation meeting. This step would go a long way to restore your family.

11. Open a New Chapter

Narrate the unique understanding you got through the word of God and list the new character you’ll put up for the peace of the family.

12. Question and Answer

Give room for question and answer during the meeting and you would be amazed that this step would lead to your family restoration.

To restore your family is a healthy process that brings joy to the heart of the family members. Family restoration promotes unity and enhances long life. I had tried the steps above and they worked perfectly. I want you to follow the steps above and you would surely get your family restored in Jesus name.

Family Conflict: 10 Steps to Conflict Resolution

Posted by Oct 21, 2019 Holy Word, Family 2 Comments
Family Conflict: 10 Steps to Conflict Resolution

Family conflict is an inevitable misunderstanding that helps the Christian home to grow stronger if the resolution is carefully done.

About 90 percent of runaway youth accommodated in shelters organized by the Family Youth Service Bureau and 75.5 percent in residential programs reported family conflict as critical issues leading to their homelessness.

This information is alarming, but today’s message would enlighten you on the significance of family conflict and how to get over it in a godly way.

What are the Causes of Family Conflict?

  1. Financial matters: Shortage of funds to pay bills or loss of job.   
  2. Unfaithfulness: extramarital affairs
  3. Different opinions related to child bearing and nurturing
  4. Cogent decision-making for the family
  5. Lack of proper communication which include; cursing, insulting and yelling can trigger family conflict.
  6. Learning to live as a new couple
  7. Attempt to separate or divorce
  8. Sibling rivalry
  9. Scope for child discipline
  10. Interference of Extended Family or In-Laws
  11. Difference in spiritual understanding

10 Effects of Unresolved Family Crisis

  1. Cancelation of Family altar which can cause family dysfunction, such as marital stress, violence and bad psychological manipulation of the children.
  2. Emotional disturbance
  3. Anxiety
  4. Post-traumatic stress syndrome
  5. Depression.
  6. Family conflict can lead to child neglect
  7. Mental Health
  8. It melts the Agape love away and could lead to separation or divorce
  9. Extreme case of unresolved family conflict can trigger suicidal thoughts.
  10.  Family conflicts put-off God’s presence in such family.

10 Steps to Family Conflict Resolutions

Since there is no perfect home without family conflict, then the following reliable resolutions can help you keep your home intact. I won’t forget to tell you that it works for me very well:

1. Recite the Lord’s Prayer: When provocation knocks at your door, respond by reciting the Lord’s Prayer in your heart. This is one of the key solutions that helps me to control exchange of harsh words in my family.

“A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.” (Proverbs 15:1)

2. Go for Fresh air: This is essential when the conflict raised the room temperature so high that if care is not taking, it can lead to ‘explosion’. Thirty minutes’ walk can calm your anger and it also give audience to the Holy Spirit to minister peace to you.

3. Find Common level: Arguments does not resolve conflicts. Try to understand the common ground which becomes the parameters for conflict resolution.

4. Listen and Stay Calm: Put emotions aside and listen to what your family members say and understand what they mean. Then carefully explain your side of the topic with the intention to establish a common understanding.

5. Be hard on the challenge: Don’t be hard on your family member(s), but address the problem sharply rather than laying blames.

6. Entertain questions: Questions from both sides would give a clear picture of family conflicts that arise as a result of misunderstanding or misinformation. No one knows all when it comes to family conflict resolution.

7. Open the Bible: Family conflict resolution becomes a reality if you and your family members take the word of God as the reference point. It removes the plank in your eyes.

“And why do you look at the speck in your brother’s eye, but do not consider the plank in your own eye? Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Let me remove the speck from your eye’; and look, a plank is in your own eye…?” (Matthew 7:3-5)

8. Family Altar: To pray together is a strong action that solves family conflict very fast.

9. Seeking Elder’s Help: When the family conflict resolution hits the wall at the final stage, then it is wise to invite one or two men of God to mediate.

“Moreover, if your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault between you and him alone. If he hears you, you have gained your brother.

But if he will not hear, take with you one or two more, that ‘by the mouth of two or three witnesses every word may be established. And if he refuses to hear them, tell it to the church…” (Matthew 18:15-17)

10. Contribution of Solutions: Once both sides of the family have a common understanding of the matter, then it is time to allow contribution of solutions from both sides. Your willingness to compromise would achieve meaningful conflict resolutions.

Family conflict is not a curse, but a test situation for every family on earth. Conflict can bring healing, unity and strength to the family if the resolution is done in a godly manner.

Family Curse: 5 Powerful Ways to Overcome Generational Curse

Posted by Aug 31, 2019 Holy Word, Family 2 Comments
Family Curse: 5 Powerful Ways to Overcome Generational Curse

Family curse is an unusual and abnormal terrible situation of life that extends from one generation of the family to another. Generational curses are consistent from age to age and seem to be unbreakable.

But today’s message will explain the features of family curse and how to overcome it completely.

The family of Kennedy is an uninteresting instance of family curse related to untimely death:

Joseph Kennedy Jr, the elder brother of John F Kennedy (JFK), was killed when his bomber aircraft explodes over Suffolk during the Second World War. (August 12, 1944)

Kathleen Cavendish, JFK’s sister and the wife of Marquess of Hartington, dies in a plane crash in France. (May 13, 1948)

President John F. Kennedy was assassinated in Dallas, Texas. (November 22, 1963)

Robert Kennedy, JFK’s younger brother and his attorney general was assassinated after winning the California Democratic primary. (June 6, 1968)

David Kennedy, the fourth of RFK’s eleven children, died in a Florida hotel room after overdosing on cocaine, painkillers and anti-psychotic medicine. (April 25, 1984)

Michael Kennedy, the sixth of RFK’s children, was killed in a skiing accident in Colorado. The 39-year-old was playing American football when he crashed into a tree. (December 31, 1997)

John F Kennedy Junior, the JFK’s son, died while flying his light aircraft to the holiday island of Martha’s Vineyard. (July 16, 1999)

Mary Kennedy, the estranged wife of Robert Kennedy Jr, hanged herself at her New York home. (May 16, 2012)

It is important to take any horrible trending event in your family with all seriousness, because it might be a family curse that must be broken immediately.

How does Family Curse Arises?

A generational curse has its origin from the sins of the fore fathers. Obedience attracts Blessings, but disobedience leads to curse which can extend from one generation to another generation.

For instance, the Lord told the Israelites that they would enjoy the blessings listed from verse 3 to 14 of Deuteronomy chapter 28, but their disobedience will attract the curses recorded in verse 16 to 68.

“Now it shall come to pass, if you diligently obey the voice of the LORD your God, to observe carefully all His commandments which I command you today, that the LORD your God will set you high above all nations of the earth. And all these blessings shall come upon you and overtake you, because you obey the voice of the LORD your God… ”

“…But it shall come to pass, if you do not obey the voice of the LORD your God, to observe carefully all His commandments and His statutes which I command you today, that all these curses will come upon you and overtake you…”

Adam and Eve disobeyed the instruction of the LORD and they were cursed. But thanks to Jesus Christ for His obedience to the instructions of redemption which gave us deliverance and blessings today.

Romans chapter 5 verses 14 and 15: “Nevertheless death reigned from Adam to Moses, even over those who had not sinned according to the likeness of the transgression of Adam, who is a type of Him who was to come. But the free gift is not like the offense. For if by the one man’s offense many died, much more the grace of God and the gift by the grace of the one Man, Jesus Christ, abounded to many.”

Family curse arises in your home, because you engaged in the same sin or disobedience committed by your great or grandparents.

Is God involved in Family Curse?

Please I don’t want you to be confused with the wrong teachings out there. God is not the author of Family curse!

God is not interested in afflicting us with family curses and that was the reason for the death of Jesus on the cross.

Many ignorant people quotes Exodus chapter 34 verses 6 and 7 as a reference that God puts curse on them.

“And the LORD passed before him and proclaimed, “The LORD, the LORD God, merciful and gracious, longsuffering, and There are many men who are suffering from this order is unable to produce an offspring. abounding in goodness and truth, “keeping mercy for thousands, forgiving iniquity and transgression and sin, by no means clearing the guilty, visiting the iniquity of the fathers upon the children and the children’s children to the third and the fourth generation.”

But I want you to do a careful study of the book of Ezekiel chapter 18:

“…The soul who sins shall die. The son shall not bear the guilt of the father, nor the father bear the guilt of the son. The righteousness of the righteous shall be upon himself, and the wickedness of the wicked shall be upon himself…For I have no pleasure in the death of one who dies,” says the Lord GOD. “Therefore turn and live!”

Devil and his demons are the striking players sustaining the goals of family curse in peoples’ lives. And, their main tactics is to lure each generation into the same sin that produces the particular curse.

How to get deliverance from Family Curse

You don’t need to pay a penny to anyone for breaking any family curse. Follow the points below and the terrible family trends such as; irrational fear, depression, divorce, incurable sickness, poverty, untimely death and other similar family curses shall be broken.

1. Identify the Sins 

Find out your family history and identify the common sin your past generations had committed. Do a thorough research to understand the origin. It might be as a result of witchcraft, cheat, carelessness or other spiritual involvements.

2. Ask for Forgiveness

Devil will not want you to carry out this step with all your heart, because it is the first bomb shell. He might deceive you that your family curse is not spiritual but something else.

Ask God with all your heart to forgive your past generations and to also forgive you for committing same or similar sin. Stop the sinful practice immediately!  “What shall we say then? Shall we continue in sin that grace may abound?” (Romans 6:1)

3. Kneel at the foot of Jesus

If your life is not hot for the Lord, then you have to take your salvation very serious. How? Surrender your lifestyle to the Lord Jesus. You must be ready to obey all the instructions of the LORD that would guide you to live a sinless life.

Confessing your sins and obeying the instructions of the Lord with all your heart is a terrible blow that hits the demons responsible for your family curse.

4. Faithful Prayers breaks Family Curse

There is no shortcut to stop the generational curse than to start faithful prayers. This fourth step gives you the ability to take authority from the devil.

You have to dedicate some days for prayers and fasting. The Holy Spirit will guide you on how to select the prayer points.

You must mention the entire curses one after the other and break them by the Authority of the Lord Jesus.

Pray loudly that all the demons manifesting in your family through the sinful loopholes should leave you and your family in the Name above all names – Jehovah. And, pray that the Spirit of the Lord should control your heart and your spouse and children.

“…that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, of those in heaven, and of those on earth, and of those under the earth, and that every tongue should confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.” (Philippians 2:10-11)

5. Marry the Bible

At this point you are delivered, but your feet must be strengthened in this new path of righteousness. The Word of God is your Strength.

 Yes! You have chased out the demons, but they will come back in a deceptive form and whisper for permission to come into your family affairs. The best response to them is the Word of God. Since you can’t give what you don’t have you must be reading the Bible day and night.

This will orient you to know the wonderful promises of GOD for your life, the Power of Salvation you are entitled to, the great authority you have over the devil and his demons and the extent of deliverance you will enjoy after the family curse is broken.

“When an unclean spirit goes out of a man, he goes through dry places, seeking rest, and finds none. Then he says, ‘I will return to my house from which I came.’ And when he comes, he finds it empty, swept, and put in order. Then he goes and takes with him seven other spirits more wicked than himself, and they enter and dwell there; and the last state of that man is worse than the first…” (Matthew 12:43-45)

40 Character of a Christian Child in the Family

Posted by Mar 3, 2019 Holy Word, Family Leave a Comment
40 Character of a Christian Child in the Family

A Christian child is God’s representative in the generation the parent won’t be privileged to coordinate. It is not an easy task to raise a godly child, because the external influence in our society today is terribly bad.

I heard this news few days ago:

“Around 27,000 children in England, some as young as 10, belong to ruthless gangs, an in-depth study by the Children’s Commissioner revealed this shocking development.

Anne Longfield, the Children’s Commissioner for England, published her study as she hosted a summit bringing together police and crime commissioners, senior police officers and chairs of local safeguarding boards.

The report, “Keeping Kids Safe: Improving Safeguarding Responses to Gang Violence and Criminal Exploitation’’, estimates that only a fraction of child gang-members are known to children’s services.

Longfield said, “The criminal gangs operating in England are complex and ruthless organisations, using sophisticated techniques to groom children and chilling levels of violence to keep them compliant.

Her report said some children may only identify loosely with a gang and may not be involved in crime or serious violence, but the most important is the estimated 34,000 children who know gang members and who have experienced violence in 2018.

The research has looked into the characteristics of children involved in gangs and found 95 per cent more likely to have social, emotional and mental health issues and more than twice as likely to be self-harming.

The stark figures also revealed that 41 per cent more likely to have a parent or carer who misuses substances.

Over a third of gang members are more likely to have witnessed domestic violence, with 37 per cent more likely to be missing or absent from their schools.

Other signs pointing to children belonging to gangs include a 20 per cent rise in children assaulted with a sharp object between 2016 and 2017, and a 67 per cent rise between 2012 and 2017 in the number of kids permanently excluded from their schools.”

Today’s message enlists the crucial character a Christian child must possess in the family and the society.

  1. Fear God
  2. Zero respect for idols
  3. Your tongue finds it difficult to roll out abusive slangs or words
  4. Honour your father and mother
  5. Doing everything to always safe a life and not to murder
  6. A Christian child is zealous to help the poor
  7. Always humble, and no sign of pride
  8. Patience and endurance in all things
  9. Compassion is a vital virtue
  10.  Christian child Possess a forgiving heart
  11.  Thorough in every good work
  12.  The diligent hands of a Christian child give riches
  13.   Keep a tight rein on your tongue
  14.  Deep love for God
  15.  Selfless service for your neighbour
  16.  Faithful to the Lord
  17.  Prayer-loving
  18.  Christian child always long to increase in wisdom
  19.  Dislikes physical and emotional uncleanliness
  20.  Obedient to the Lord, but, disobedient to the ‘sweet’ rules of the world
  21.  Motivate people without witchcraft practice
  22.  Christian child always fulfils promises to God and man
  23.  Self-control in times of trouble
  24.  A Christian child has a thankful heart even during hard times
  25.  Handles temptations with careful dissection of the word of God
  26.  Not arrogant, but, a Christian child is teachable
  27.  Obtain godly counsel and disregard carnal counsel
  28.  Ability to behave properly during shortage or abundance
  29.  Bold to tell everyone to join the wagon of holiness in Christ
  30.  Does not compare himself with others and would never be jealous
  31.  Not carried away by emotions
  32.  A Christian child is characterized as a role model
  33.  Hardworking
  34.  Does not mess up with money; no gambling, reckless expenses or extravagance
  35.  Christian child produces life of moral excellence
  36.  Bold to say ‘no’ to sin
  37.  Eager to spread the gospel everyday
  38.  Pride cannot be traced to a Christian child
  39.  Respects the works of the Holy Spirit
  40.  A Christian child stands up when he/she stumbles

All these attributes are based on the scriptural teachings of our Lord Jesus Christ.

Matthew chapter 5: “…Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the earth…Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God. Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons of God…”

I pray the Lord will shine His Light of Salvation into the heart of every Christian child in our homes in Jesus name.

22 Character that can hurt Marriage; Work against Divorce!

Posted by Apr 29, 2018 Holy Word, Family Leave a Comment
22 Character that can hurt Marriage; Work against Divorce!

The incidence of hurt marriage is spreading like wildfire! And the best we can do is to identify the ‘viruses and worms’ attacking the marriage programming of our generation.

The level of divorce and remarriage is worrisome in the Christendom. Prophet Malachi says: “…Therefore take heed to your spirit, and let none deal treacherously with the wife of his youth. “For the LORD God of Israel says That He hates divorce, For it covers one’s garment with violence,” Says the LORD of hosts.”

There are some terrible things that happen in the marriage, but do not quickly file for divorce on matters that can be resolved amicably. God hates divorce!

I remembered the painful story of Dr. Richard:

“Eight years ago, the wife of Dr. Richard Batista was slowly dying due to failing kidneys. The Batistas’s marriage was already on shaky ground due to Dawnell’s deteriorating health but just then, Richard decided to take a more active part in his wife’s recovery and gave her his own kidney.

It was magical; after Dawnell’s body rejected the transplants from her dad and brother, it turned out she and Richard were a perfect 1-in-700,000 match. Surely it was destiny, and it could have gone down as one of the most romantic gift ever (he gave her part of himself).

It could have, if the recovered Mrs. Batista did not then allegedly defied the bed with another person. The husband, enraged over the lack of gratitude, demanded his kidney back.

Someone presumably explained that the courts likely would not reward him the right to go to work on his wife with a butcher knife, so he is asking for $1.5 million instead, which is presumably what it costs to get a good replacement kidney off the black market…” Too bad to experience!

Run away from the following character that can hurt marriage:

1. Dis-trustfulness

2. Nagging irritates your spouse

3. Laziness can hurt marriage

4. Conjecture breaks marriage

5. Arguments spark bitterness

6. Lack of Correlative Respect

7. Keeping helpful secrets from your spouse

8. Unforgiving

9. Lies

10. Extramarital Relations

11. Bad Communication skills

12. More Interaction with friends than your spouse

13. Spending little time with your spouse

14. Love for Party and Clubbing

15. Not fervent in Spiritual matters

16. Not Sharing Thoughts with each other

17. Careless Talks and Jokes

18. Public exposure of your spouse’s inadequacies

19. Rejecting Corrections hurt marriage

20. Lack of God’s Knowledge in the Bible can hurt marriage

21. Hot Temperament

22. Always wearing a sad face!

 

Do everything to keep your marriage, either in the midst of the storm or in the rosy garden of abundance. The popular practice of divorce and remarry is ungodly, and it’s not for genuine Christians.

“So Jesus said to them, “Whoever divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery against her. And if a woman divorces her husband and marries another, she commits adultery.” (Mark 10:11-12)

Anyone who divorce would either remain single till death, or reconcile with his/her spouse.

I deduce from my marital experience that if I am faithful to the Lord in all my ways, then it will be difficult to hurt marriage.